Harsh , mean , selfish … whatever the hell you want to call it , cool with me . I’m this way for a reason . It just doesn’t sit well with me to give a guy I’m dating money. It feels like he should respect me enough not to ask me for it in the first place. I’m the girl he’s dating, not his private bank! In addition, if a guy doesn’t respect me enough to have relationship boundaries in place, then by giving him money I’m just disrespecting myself too. I’m so not about that anymore. Nowadays, I put myself first to protect myself. Take it or leave it! It may seem unfair , or as if I’ll never fully just trust my partner but I’ve been hurt way too many times after SAVING Men financially early on in the relationship . They start off small , then BOOM , you’re paying rent. I will never give money to who I’m with ever again. Here are 5 reasons why:
1. At first it may seem like what they’re asking for isn’t too much , and because you have a kind heart you say what the hell . You’ll find yourself being someone that they depend on to finance their whole life . I never wanted to be that type of a girlfriend, I’m the type that needs to find security and stability in a man and feel taken care of, wanting and needing nothing … because he has me. Having a good heart ain’t never got me reimbursed.
2. It will change everything . From the way you imagined your life/ relationship to go , to the way you feel mentally . You’ll find yourself having to put what you usually do / need to do for yourself off just to make sure your person is happy and taken care of . But what about you? Who’s going to take care of you ?
3. No woman should have to worry about carrying the financial burden of a grown ass man . It is that man’s job to make sure we are straight in all aspects of life . Most of us don’t want to fully depend on our partner so we work and make things happen on our end . I myself don’t mind helping out sometimes, when I see fit but being obligated to hold the heavy side of the stick all of the time is no fun at all . Most of the time they don’t even ask if you’re in the position to help , they just start volunteering your money !
4. Having guys ask you for money all the time will have you thinking “why me?” Out of all the people , family members and friends , you chose me ? It’s a major red flag if you’re the only person they can go to . It leaves you with thoughts like “ who else has he gotten over on?” And “what am I doing to come off as someone you can just con, whenever?”
5. They will try their best to manipulate you into giving them money . I never wanted to be the woman who gave up everything just to get her man back on his feet . I’ve always wanted a man to come to me , fully assembled but because of my healing spirit I seem to attract guys who have dreams but want to rely on me to get them there . That shit is for the birds . Not giving guys money when they ask for it shows me a lot about their personalities. For example, if they act angry or annoyed, it shows me that they’re users and losers, which means I’ve dodged a bullet—and saved some hard-earned cash that they really didn’t deserve.
No more pushed boundaries , feeling obligated & being taken advantage of . Learn to say No , if they stay they stay , if they go … let them.
What’s sexy is a man that doesn’t rely on his woman but goes out there & obtains the bag to provide on his own!!!